Occasionally, we get emails from members who are discouraged at the lack of replies they receive. For example:
“I upgraded to Premium membership, and nobody’s replying to my emails or Smiles. And nobody looks at my profile!”
When I receive an email like this, my first step is go out to the site and view the member’s profile. More often than not, the member has only logged in a few times, sent out a couple of emails, and maybe a few Smiles. They’ve usually written very little (if anything) in the “More about me…” section of their profile, and, at best, uploaded one or two blurry photos.
This tells me two things: The person isn’t very outgoing, and completely misses the point of online dating. Being shy or reserved isn’t a character flaw. That might just be who you are as a person. But if you want results, you’re going to have to step outside of your comfort zone a little and flirt!
“But that’s not my style!” you say. Fair enough, but you already took the leap and entered the online dating scene. That was a big step in and of itself. Being a wallflower simply isn’t going to work. Get energized and get active!
Upload Photos!
A good, clear photo of yourself works wonders. While some of you might not want your photos posted online for personal reasons, the fact is that the vast majority of other members want to see who you are. Members with photos are given priority in search results, too.
Log in often!
Logging into the site automatically moves your profile to the top of the search results. So logging in often and having at least one photo on your profile increases your chances of being seen a great deal.
Send lots of emails and Smiles!
Here’s where we get to the heart of the matter. You have to put some effort into meeting people if you want results. I’m looking at you, Premium members! You upgraded to Premium membership so you could make first contact with other members. Take advantage of it! Invite people to chat. Send them emails introducing yourself. Go on vDates. Have fun! And basic members: continue to log in often and send lots of Smiles. You can reply to emails for free, so being active on the site is sure to get you noticed, and garner you more emails and more chat / vDate requests.
Don’t rely on someone else to take the first step. Be proactive and put yourself out there.
By Avery Williamson
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