Relationships.
It's hard to know how to pick the perfect mate, as a matter of fact, it's damn near impossible. First, your eyes are setting you up by going "hmmm, she's perfect" well, I've got news for you, your eyes know nothing. All they ever want to do is look. They don't want to talk, dream, touch or be touched or be served coffee in the morning. Also, the eyes are total assholes- they will turn on you faster than anything. Take the first morning you see something the eyes have had the deciding vote on, get up, out of bed, sans nothing including combed hair, brushed teeth, or clothes. If it doesn't work for the eyes at that point- they run interference with the whole rest of the body. The ears can't hear a thing, the stomach is churning relentlessly, the heart is stopping on and off and the head is going through dread-lock.. that's a term of dread, not a hairdoo. The eyes have made a pact with the mouth just to get her out of here. The mouth engages "well, I guess you best be off to work, I know I have a long day- I'll call you." The body is now assisting the eyes by ushering (USHERING?) the poor girl out of the door. Bad scenario. This is why the eyes should not be allowed to vote.
Same with the ears. The ears will listen to anything. The woman has no home, no car, and no clean clothes. The ears hear her say sweetly, softly, and with a voice like honey "I've had some recent hard times, but I just got a phone interview yesterday for a great job and they've asked me to come in this week. I just need a friend to help me out." Your ears are hearing seduction. They enlist the eyes at this point (who were not allowed to vote, but got shuttled in through the back door by the ears) "Nice, sweet" shout the eyes. The brain picks it up. "Sweet? Sweet? Like babies and Rebecca of Sunnybrook Farm? WE should help her by falling in love with her!" "Falling in love? I LOVE TO BE IN LOVE." the heart is immediately on board and when the heart is on board- the libido is in the life raft rowing right beside. She moves in and three weeks later she is still watching soap operas on your couch. Plus, there is not as much "intimacy" as the libido thought. Libido starts the rumblings "Kick her out, she's a freeloader!" The eyes pick it up "yeah, and she don't look so good." The heart is more reluctant "Aren't we in love, won't we get married and live together forever?" The mind has a different opinion now, based on sneaky found facts. "Wise up simpleton, she's had other girls here while we've been to work, you've pulled out your wallet one to many time with no reciprocation. Dump her."
Next we turn to the heart who botches up everything. The heart picks out someone who can't be loved, but should be. The eyes like her, the ears like her, the mind knows it ain't going to happen and the libido is utterly frustrated. This unrequited love, but with fringe flirts, can go on for months or years. The eyes do start to wander- they need immediate gratification and the libido pays them to see what else is out there. The ears join in half the time- listening for signs of attraction from someone new, but the other half of the time, working for the heart which is hoping for a sign to say she's starting to swing their way. Finally the mind has to put a stop to it, using the old "there are other fish out in the sea" message along with " we are losing everything holding on to this dream". Since everyone besides the heart is bored- there is a mutiny and the woman who can't be loved, but should be, is gone.
Finally, it is the mind's turn. The mind rejects the eyes jumping up and down at every nice pair of eyes, legs, dance moves, hair, smile. The mind logs in those things to a central data base. The mind uses the ears to record answers- not just voice tones. "how do you feel about children? Do you have a job? A car? A lover? The ears record answers for the mind. The mind put's the libido on hold pointing out the fine messes that it has gotten them into before. The libido isn't happy, but is forced to keep it's opinions to itself. Finally the mind consults with the heart. Well, the heart always wants what the heart wants. There is always a dialogue. Sometimes the mind wins, at which time there is a mutually respectful, loving, healthy relationship in which the heart can also thrive. Sometimes the heart overrides the mind in which case the mind leaves a diary, makes sure a will is in order and has the body take martial arts (just in case) you see, the heart is a fighter- physical, emotional and everything in between. If the heart has dictated the relationship, the mind works overtime to make sure that all thought, research and knowledge as to what to expect is in place. The mind is no fool- but sometimes the mind snaps. Okay, a lot of times the mind snaps. So, reviewing everything possible to insure relationship success- what is the most plausible chance to achieve Nirvana? You're asking me? After 7 or 8 eye relationships, 4 or 5 ear ones, 5-6 libido relationships (give or take a few), one mind one (boring) and 3 or 4 hearts where I nearly died, you're asking me. After all of these relationships and all of these years my best advice: arranged marriages. Good Luck- and if you have a better formula, do write in.

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